


Maybe a Little Bit

by enchantedsleeper



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Because the Doctor really needed a hug after everything that happened, F/F, Fluff, Introspection, Post-S12 E5: Fugitive of the Judoon, Tardis family, The Doctor is a Disaster Bi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:21:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22427776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enchantedsleeper/pseuds/enchantedsleeper
Summary: A slightly extended version of the end scene from Series 12 Episode 5: Fugitive of the Judoon. The Doctor is struggling to come to terms with everything that has taken place. Yaz tries to offer a little bit of comfort.
Relationships: Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan
Comments: 17
Kudos: 122





	Maybe a Little Bit

**Author's Note:**

> HELLO I CAN'T DEAL WITH ANYTHING THAT HAPPENED IN EPISODE 5 so I wrote this little piece of Thasmin fluffiness to try and cope. Also because the Doctor needed a hug from Yaz after everything that happened. Yes? Yes.
> 
> (I stayed up until 1am on a work night to write this, VALIDATE ME)

"You haven't told us about Lee and Ruth and the Judoon," Yaz pressed, as the Doctor sat on the honeycomb-shaped steps of the TARDIS. She felt as though her head was barely holding together; she was clinging on to the present by a thread. Everything felt distant and removed. "Who was the fugitive?"

The Doctor stared at the floor, seeing Ruth's face - no, _her_ face, her own face. She had no idea how to even begin telling them what had happened, and yet it felt like too much effort to keep it from them.

"It was Ruth," she said, softly. "But Ruth was me."

All three of them reacted with predictable disbelief. The Doctor felt like laughing - or crying, maybe - when Graham insisted that there had to be a "simple explanation". They had no idea, none. She couldn't stop the bitterness from spilling out when Ryan confidently declared that the Doctor had "got them". 

"Ryan... I've lived for thousands of years, so long I've lost count. I've had so many faces. How long have you been here?"

She saw Ryan draw back a little in hurt and indignation. A distant part of her knew that she was being cruel, but this was who she was. They were going to have to learn that. Maybe she'd been fooling herself, this whole time, trying to pretend otherwise. Trying to put off the inevitable.

"You don't know me. Not even a little bit." 

Yaz, of course, didn't hold back. Always direct, always forthright. "Don't talk to him like that!" The Doctor braced herself for more anger - she deserved that - but instead they surprised her. 

"We do know who you are," Ryan insisted. "You're the woman that brought us together. The woman that saved us and loads of other people."

 _But not enough. Never enough,_ the Doctor thought. But still - her surroundings felt a tiny bit warmer and brighter. The ground under her felt a little more solid. She allowed herself to believe, when they told her that they were her family. 

The TARDIS' alarm blared suddenly, cutting through the sentimental moment. The Doctor jumped to her feet, pulling her usual energetic persona around herself like a cloak, gathering it close.

"I know what you're doing," she chided the TARDIS, running to the console. "Siding with them, distracting me. You're doing this deliberately." She did appreciate it a bit, though. Something to focus on. For now.

"Woah!" Okay, maybe not a distraction. "Multiple alerts across three continents here on Earth. Can't be connected... Unless they are."

She looked back at the fam - her fam. Family. "Quick look?" 

"Quick look," Yaz agreed, as all three of them grinned and nodded.

"Let's go." The Doctor pushed down on the lever. She called out instructions to Ryan and Graham to secure things, and they scrambled to comply. The Doctor whirled around - and suddenly came face to face with Yaz. "Oh. Hi!"

She wasn't expecting Yaz to pull her, wordlessly, into a hug.

The Doctor flailed her arms slightly before tentatively putting them around Yaz's back. Yaz squeezed her for a couple more moments before letting go and stepping back, her cheeks flushed.

"Sorry," she said, with an apologetic smile, brushing a piece of hair behind one ear. "I know you don't do... physical contact all that much. It's just - you looked so sad, earlier, and then here in the TARDIS, and I thought that you might need a hug."

The Doctor was pretty sure her own cheeks were bright pink. "I. Um. I mean. Yes. Hug. Good."

Yaz smiled and nodded once. "I'd better go help Ryan," she said, and darted away.

"Thanks," the Doctor called after her, slightly dazedly.

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact: I wasted like 20 minutes while writing this trying to look up what the lever thing is called that the Doctor pushes down when sending the TARDIS somewhere. I concluded that it is called a "lever".
> 
> If anyone knows otherwise, please do let me know!
> 
> [Come flail with me on Tumblr](https://iffeelscouldkill.tumblr.com/)


End file.
